Nitty Gritty World

Here is some of what's been going on in my brain as it's been awhile...

So I don't watch the news, read the paper, read internet news sources, or magazines...I'm intentionally uninformed. Yes, intentional, I make a point to avoid these at any cost, change the channel, skip articles, close internet browsers. Somewhere in the past few months I decided it wasn't good for me to know all the nitty gritty details of the world, because one, almost all of those details are negative - and more importantly driven fear...as anxious as I am with maintaining my life in general and as obsessive as I am at analyzing things, I don't need anymore. Which brings me to my second reason, contrary to popular belief (for me and only me), it's not good for me to be over-informed. For me, this does more harm then good, I rely on God waaay less, I feed my already too large of a desire to analyze things to death, and I provoke more of this anxiety as "discover" that there is one more thing that I watch out for, get tested for, precaution to take...before I know it...all I'm doing is taking precautions --- and that's NEVER been me. Now, I do agree that I shouldn't be stupid - I drive on ice only when necessary, I don't eat paint chips, I brush and floss my teeth...but really...do I need to do all those other things??? The thing is it appears fairly logically, that yes we should. I should make sure I get that vaccine, not drink from the BPA plastic water bottles, and check my credit score. Now most people the ability to prioritize these things for themselves, however, I do not. I struggle greatly in the area of prioritizing, it comes very very unnaturally to me. So, I take all the information as level 1 priority. I think it stresses me out more then I know. Thus, why I've cut the over-information out. I'm fine absorbing what I need to from my coworkers, friends, and the radio. If I really need to know more, I'll google it.

When did it get so late??? I'm doing well at maintaining a decent bed time this week...so I'm off.

My (cheap) easy dinners...

Living on my own I've discovered that I don't know how to cook and that eating out is too expensive. I'm not really sure how I survived the last year, I remember eating lots of chips and salsa... So in the past few months it's been my quest to learn how to cook, simple, healthy recipes. I thought this would be a breeze, but it turns out that one, it's really hard to find simple, healthy recipes and two, being a visual and kinestic learner, I don't learn best by reading a recipe. And besides, I wanted (still want) to actually learn how to cook so I can create things on my own or vary a recipe (without it turning terrible). So I've been on the hunt, asking anyone and everyone to share their everyday recipes - I'm not looking for the fancy stuff, just what you make yourself for dinner. And forcing all those I come in contact with at meal time to teach me what they are doing - beware you may fall victim to this.

So in light of what I've been learning I thought I would share my recipes (note, these are not all healthy...that has been waay more difficult).

Mom's Super Simple Chili:
2 cans of tomatoes "chili ready" (it will say this on the can)
1 can of beans "chili ready"
1 lb (or less) of ground turkey

Brown turkey, drain fat, put everything together in a big pot, wait until it's hot (some think letting it simmer makes it taste better) then eat.

Beans and Weenies (as inspired by my grandparents, but made with mom's simplicity)
1 can of cheap pork and beans
Favorite BBQ sauce
2 turkey hot dogs

Slice turkey dogs, add to pork and beans, add as much bbq sauce as you like (I go by color), then heat up (stove or microwave works).
*I found a bbq sauce that is light on sodium and calories.

Katy's Baked Chicken
Chicken tenders or breasts (however many you want to eat)
Crackers (I use healthy saltines)
Spices
*Egg if you are making more then one or two servings

Thaw chicken, preheat oven to 375 to 400 degrees, crush crackers (enough cover your chicken) into a very fine dusty like texture (Katy says so they don't look like crackers anymore) - Katy uses a food processor to do this, I crush them in a bowl with the bottom of a spice bottle. Add spices to crackers - this is where I have a hard time and have to consult the internet - whatever spices you like and think would go together. If you are making enough that it makes it worth it to crack a whole egg, then do it, coat the chicken it the egg (Katy says it makes it better, but I've never made enough to try it). Season chicken (salt and pepper it). Put chicken in crushed crackers and coat well. Coat pan with Pam - if you don't own Pam like me, I wipe a bit of oil on the bottom of the pan - Katy says to do this even if you're using a non-stick pan because it helped it brown the outside a bit. Bake in oven for 10 to 20 minutesish...I check every 10 mins. and cut the chicken open a bit to see if it's cooked.

Black Bean Pizza (it's been awhile since I've made this...so it's a bit vague)
1 can of black beans - rinsed
Pesto (can typically find this premade in the store - my mom finds hers in the produce department by the salads at Target in a tube)
Mozzarella cheese - shredded
Premade pizza crust (whole wheat if you can find it) - I think find these in the pasta aisle
*Tomatoes (fresh or canned - drained) (optional)

Preheat oven to a reasonable temperature (350ish), rinse black beans, spread pesto on pizza crust enough to cover the crust you don't need a ton, add black beans, then tomatoes if you would like, then cover with as much mozzarella as you would like. Bake until cheese has melted and crust looks good enough to eat.

So if you have any simple recipes please let me know...variety is a good thing.

Passive Voice?

I finally learned what "passive voice" meant! I just hit ignore on grammar check all through college, because I had no idea what it was talking about. Who knew it helped make my ideas more clear? I can now be even more anal when writing papers. :)

Sorry to all those grammatical experts out there that twinge every time they read improper English, but I plan on being as passive as I like on here...being unpassive would require waaaay too much thinking...and this is about free flowing thoughts.

Otherwise, good day. Had breakfast with an old mentor, did laundry, worked on my super secret book - to get me in the mood for working on my essay, hung out with awesome cats, and now working on my essay. It amazes me something so short can consume so much of my time.

Eating beans and weenies drinking dr. pepper...and writing

So I'm trying to write an essay for a grad school application...it's suppose to be a narrative. I haven't got my spark...which is killing me. I hate writing without a spark on things like this...because it just turns out manufactured. It's so much more real when I do it when I have a spark. And for some reason that spark makes it go from simply okay, to INCREDIBLE. And since I would really like to get into this particular grad school, I'm shooting for the incredible. That being said, I can only recall a handful (or once) when I've written with the mindset that I truly wanted something incredible...but it wasn't a paper paper. So, alas this trying to write an incredible paper is new territory. I don't normally care. Now I care. And I'm a bit scared because of it.

I've been trying to listen to songs that make me want to change the world to get my spark. I've been trying to think of all the great times I've had with clients. I've tried drawing pictures to help. Drinking caffeine to get me a bit more hyper (and passionate). I'm thinking that I just need to go to bed and try again tomorrow evening. I'm tired. Arg. Now I can feel my adderall kicking in...getting too tired to write, but not capable of sleeping. This ought to be interesting.

Good Laughs

I love my late night network-knock-off-channel tv. I mean what more could you really need? I have everything from According to Jim, Two and Half Men, Everybody Loves Raymond, King of Queens, Scrubs, Frasier, Seinfeld, Sex and the City, and trashy entertainment shows. Awesome. I just laughed uncontrollably hard at According to Jim.

I also love the commercials...I'm watching an ad for Chia Cat Grass. Hilarious. Which brings me to my next thought...I'm thinking about starting a family...by getting a cat. Yes, I did have one, Koji, but he is now my parents. So I'm thinking about making the step again...big decisions :)

I'm reading this great book (at least thus far), "Confessions of an Amateur Believer" by Patty Kirk. I came across this section that I'm in awe of how well/accurately it describes belief and not believing in God...here it is...(it's just been talking about how she, like many others, believed in God so easily as a child)...

"God's invisible presence is unmistakable-it must be-in the bleakest of settings, if our senses are motivated, as the senses of children are, by dependence and need.

Unbelief comes later. Beset by troubles, or else blinded to our fundamental need and dependence by ease and by our increasing ability to take care of ourselves, some of us lose sight of God. Or we forget to look for him. As we do when a loved one dies, we eventually become accustomed to days and nights without the one we loved and gradually forget the contours of a face we once knew with our eyes closed. Soon, mourning itself is a distant memory, replaced by the more urgent activities of daily life. As time passes, we struggle to remember the person at all and carry with us only a vague sense of loss.

That is unbelief, I think. The nagging absence of a remembered face. Sometimes a certain smell or touch or sound we associate with the one we have lost reminds us. Sometimes, in the night we dream the person live and real again. But, our practical selves wake us up and convince us of what seems, in loss, to be the only reality: we are alone. Unbelief, in my experience, is much less a conscious rejection of God (not to say it can't be) than a sense of abandonment and loss. A sense of our own aloneness. And the certainty that no effort on our part can restore to us the one we loved."

I enjoy that explanation because I think we often see not believing in God to only come when we open our lips and say we don't believe. However, in reality, what it is much more common, especially in America, is a scenario such as this in which the presence of God is shoved to the back burner, then off the burner, then forgotten as we become more independent with age. I think she hit it right on when she said the more we were able to do things on our own and the less we needed God (or so we thought), the more God is shoved to the side. I think this is why we often see faith appear stronger in those who have very little, then in the rich. You're less likely to think you need Him when have money.

Alright, it's time to get to work. Happy ponderings!

Cheap Living...

Here's are some of the cheap things I take advantage of to make my life a little bit more awesome for not much money...

TV

I have a great set of "bunny ears" (and I also live close to a lot of the stations), however let's be honest unless it's prime time, there's not a lot of good shows on. So my solution - I hook a S Video cable from my computer to my tv, along with a simple maybe $5 or $10, "Y Audio Cable".

<----"Y Audio Cable"

This audio cable plugs into the headphone jack and then to your tv...easy as pie.

So why do this? As most of us know, almost every network - including cable stations- show full length episodes online. So I bring up the website, hit full screen icon, then hit the presentation button on my computer and like something only God created...the tv show appears in all it's glory on my tv. If your tv does not have a S Video input or your computer does not have an S Video output you'll need to take a few extra steps (I did), but they're simple, don't be discouraged...go to radio pick there brains and tell them you want to do it for cheap even if it means a few more steps. They're smart.

My favorite websites for finding tv shows and movies outside of the network sites...hulu.com and http://video.tvguide.com/.

The library (in kansas city at least) has free checkout for all tv shows and they have a TON of shows on DVD (i.e. Friends, Alias, The Office).

READING

-The library...I know crazy concept.

-Also, I pick up all the free magazines I can get my hands on. Some of the best in KC are Urban Times (monthly), The Pitch (weekly), and Ink (weekly). You can find most of these on street corners in the downtown and westport area.

-Magazine subscriptions are also a great idea...figure out what your favorite magazines are and most likely getting a subscription is WAY cheaper then buying them at the grocery store. A handy trick with getting the best price...look for the little cards in the magazines - those seem to have better deals then looking online.

-Also, the library is great for magazines as well...I like to go to the Plaza library get a magazine sit by the huge windows that look out over the plaza...AWESOME.

-A really simple idea...swap magazines with friends. We stock pile our old magazines as if we're going to reference them again later, but do we ever?? I only have one friend that does, and she's a designer...so for normal human beings...we should give our old magazines to friends.

-When I want to buy current magazines I go to Half Price Books, they sell used magazines for either half of the cover price or $1 if there is no cover price. I very very frequently find current magazines...people who get subscriptions as we know get them the month/week before they hit the news stand, once they're done reading they bring them in...and are there in time for the month or week they're scheduled to hit the stands. The one in westport has a HUGE selection.

OTHER

I play board games...love it. A couple options I've taken for acquiring board games, graciously take the ones off my parents hands they don't want any more, garage sales, and shop sales. Also, borrow friends games...sharing is a good thing. I like to play at my apartment or coffee shops. On that note, I order tea when I go to shops for a cheap drink or buy a really cheap thing of food like the dollar bagel at one of the shops I go to.

I like to go to parks, play catch, walk around the plaza, hangout at Barnes and Noble, shop at thrift stores, shop on craigslist.com...the list goes on.

As I remember all the other little things I do, I'll try to remember to put them on here to share!